The shirt says it in the flat, institutional voice of a hazard placard: NOT FRIENDLY DO NOT TOUCH. Above the words sits a yellow caution triangle. Inside the triangle, a hand is crossed out. That is the whole design. No slogan, no wink, no small print. It borrows the grammar of a wet-floor sign and…
The Pawn Reaches the Last Rank In chess, a pawn that reaches the farthest rank must be exchanged, as part of the same move, for a queen, rook, bishop, or knight of the same color. The FIDE Laws of Chess state this plainly in Article 3.7.e. The choice is not restricted to pieces that have…
The Bad Bishop of the Deep Cabinet: The Stand Mixer Your Own Pawns Are Blocking There is a stand mixer in the back of a lower cabinet. It is a good machine. It is also, by any honest measure, doing nothing. The problem is not the mixer. Too heavy, too fussy, too much bowl —…
The shirt reads GOT TOO SILLY in plain capitals across the top. Beneath the words, a white goose-like bird stands in an orange prison uniform, holding a black mugshot board. The bird’s expression is not contrite. It is the flat, unbothered stare of someone who has been processed and is already thinking about the next…
The first thing I notice on the Cat Daddy Feline Father Lover Pet Owner Funny Tee is not the cat. It is the gap. The native garment preview shows a dark shirt with light lettering: a capital C on the left, a capital T on the right, a cat silhouette between them, and the word…
Opening: The Rule You Think You Know The chess touch-move rule is often summarized as: if you touch a piece, you must move it. That summary is close enough to be useful and wrong enough to cause trouble. The actual rule is narrower and, for our purposes, more interesting. Under the FIDE Laws of Chess,…